The Screen in the Empty Theater

Last Sunday I had an experience so extraordinary that in the retelling of it to a close friend, I broke down into tears. I’m still trying to process the enormity of what I’d been shown. It’s been almost a week now, and I’m ready to write about it.

First, some backstory.

Once a month, trance channel and psychic surgeon Andy Porter hosts what he calls a Worldwide Meditation with Chen. Chen is Andy’s Spirit Guide. Andy goes into trance, and Chen comes forward and leads the meditation, working with a team of helpers, both from the Other Side and from galactic origins. Please visit his Substack here to find out more about why he does this, what is accomplished, and how you can participate. It’s an incredibly beautiful experience. And it’s always free.

There are always two parts to the meditation. Everyone’s energy field is cleared and sovereignty restored in the first part. In the second part, we collectively act as a conduit and light from what Chen calls Core Consciousness is channeled through us to our beloved Mother Earth. Every time the visualization is different. But however it ends up happening, it’s always spectacularly worthwhile, and I leave feeling thoroughly and completely energized, at peace, and full of love. I don’t want to go more deeply into the specifics of the meditation because that’s not really the point of why I’m writing about it.

My medium friend Paul once told me that I’m like a feather. As feathers help birds pick up tiny air movements, pressure changes, and vibrations, I feel small, almost imperceptible shifts in energy around me. It often gives me the ability to read the energy in a room or a situation, and it can provide me with information about others and what they’re feeling. The energy moving in this particular worldwide meditation was phenomenal. It elevated my entire being, helping me reach new levels of clarity and lightness. Setting the stage for what was to come.

The Power of an Orange

Near the end of the meditation, Chen said, “If you picture a screen right now, you’re going to see the faces of the team members here who have helped you today, and who appreciate you. You may also see your Spirit Guides.”

Of course, me being who I am, was super excited at that prospect, but also highly doubtful that it would happen. I can block and self-sabotage myself just as much as the next person. You might even say I’m an expert at it. By the way, if you’re the kind of person who thinks that you’re not really expert-level good at anything, never doubt for a moment that you definitely are. You’re expert-level good at not believing in yourself. And if that’s not the level of expertise you’re aiming for, then stop it. Stop telling the story that you don’t have the ability to do things like see your Spirit Guides and receive messages and information from Spirit. The only reason you think you can’t is most likely because that’s the story you tell yourself, and you’ve told it for so long it’s become a core belief. That, and you probably don’t practice. Understandable. If you don’t believe you can, you’re certainly not going to take practice seriously. Ask me how I know.

So the moment Chen said that, I didn’t see anything. No screen, no faces. I tried. Gave it some time. Tried again. Nothing. Not only could I not see the faces, I couldn’t even picture a screen. Then I remembered something. I thought about the last time I was asked to picture something and couldn’t. I was working on spiritual development over Zoom with Paul. We were doing a visualization exercise and he asked me to close my eyes and picture an orange. Of course, I couldn’t. “Stop trying so hard,” he said. “Picture it from memory. You already know what an orange looks like. You can describe it, right? Just see it.” So I thought about the last time I saw an orange. And I saw myself reaching into the produce drawer in my refrigerator and grabbing an orange. Ok, so it’s true, I can picture an orange. I could hear Paul’s voice in my head telling me not to overthink it. The screen is just there. If I can picture an orange, I can picture a screen. So I let go and pictured a screen.

The Empty Theater

What came to me was really specific and kind of odd. It was an empty, old fashioned cinema. The kind with balcony seating. And I was high up in the balcony, off to the left, looking down at rows of empty seats, all facing this giant screen. And there on the screen, was the flash of a face. Only the face of this being wasn’t any ordinary-looking face. It looked like a praying mantis! Now, I know of the mantis beings. I used to be an archivist for MUFON and I’m very familiar with alien lore. But I had never seen one in my meditations! This was new and exciting. This mantis had to be connected to Chen and on his team of helpers. I just knew it. And I also kind of just knew that this being had helped me before. As wild as this may sound to someone unfamiliar with seeing galactic entities in meditation (I’ve only ever seen one, but that’s all it takes to be sold on the fact that aliens communicate with us this way) what I was most excitedly anticipating was the prospect of seeing my Spirit Guide.

My Spirit Guide, (my main one, I have several and I think we all do) presents as this incredibly beautiful and powerful indigenous man of ancient Incan origin. He wears a feathered headdress, paint and tattoos on his face and body, and he also has the look of a warrior. How do I know this? Well, I’ve seen him before. Only briefly, like glimpses here and there, in my meditations. Paul can see him easily. That’s how I became aware of him initially. But that’s another story. I’m relentlessly determined to see him more clearly, and I practice almost every day.

So then I thought, if I can see a mantis being, surely I can see my Guide. And with that thought, two of my Guides appeared on the screen next to the mantis. My main Guide and my Gatekeeper Guide. If you don’t know what a Gatekeeper Guide is, I highly suggest taking a detour here.

High up in the balcony I couldn’t see the details as clearly as I wanted to. But each time I get a glimpse of my Guide, new details surface and more is revealed. This time there was more paint on his face. And the word ‘feral’ came to mind. Wild, untamed, fierce. I don’t mean that in a bad way at all. Quite the opposite. He is of nature, wild and free, living in a forested, untamed area. Beautiful in that way. It’s a quality that I admire, and I recognize that desire in myself too.

The more I sat with that thought, the more I started to see.

Then the view shifted and I saw myself in a third person view, standing alone down in the middle of the theater, looking up at the screen. The Guides were looking straight ahead at that third person me with these serious faces, until it seemed they realized my realization that I could see them. And then they laughed. Was that a high five? It felt joyous, like a celebration, like they were saying, she finally sees us. She finally gets it.

Blending

I wanted to project my consciousness down into that version of myself standing near the screen, to get a closer look, and to make more of a connection. I tried, and I kept popping in and out. In retrospect, I think it was out of fear. A quiet fear that I wasn’t going to see it right, or get it right at all. And self-doubt, which is a general, overarching theme in my life. I’d hold the connection for a second, then pop right back out to watching myself watch them.

Eventually I held it long enough, and I looked up at my main Guide and it’s like he floated out of the screen towards me. When he floated out, the quality of his look changed. When he was on the screen, he’d looked colorful and vivid, and just like a regular person. But as he moved into my world, he got more ethereal, his dark skin softly glowing with an inner light. And this is how I’d seen him before. More of an ethereal light being.

In that moment I more fully understood something I hadn’t really put into words before. That’s how he comes to me in trance mediumship practice. (I plan on writing more about that practice at another time.) This is the part of him that connects and blends with me. Not his whole self, just a part of his consciousness, lowered enough to reach me, and registering in my awareness as a kind of glow. Of course he can’t bring his whole person down here, and it’s not like I ever suspected that he did. I suppose it just wasn’t until that moment I’d ever really pondered the mechanics of how it happens. But now it made sense instantly.

I popped back into the third person view and watched the more intimate blending connection happen from afar, yet at the same time, I also felt it happening to me from where I sat in the balcony. One of those kinds of multidimensional moments where you can hold awareness of different perspectives and experiences happening at the same time. Everyone has those, right? This world just gets weirder and more wonderful all the time.

I watched his enormous energy engulf me in a tender and loving way, and felt that familiar feeling of sweeping, all-encompassing bliss when he comes in.

I understood so many things in that moment. As soon as I would think a question, I instantly knew the answer. I understood that I was able to see him because the Chen meditation had elevated my energy to such a point that I could see higher realms. That screen was a window into the higher realm of his world. And I wondered if I would have to wait until the next Chen meditation to have another experience like this, and at once I also understood that I wouldn’t. I just needed to sit longer in meditation. The longer I sit, the more light I’m able to contain in my being, and the higher I soar. I just haven’t been sitting long enough, but I know that’s coming once I’m not splitting my time with library work anymore.

Through His Eyes

This is the part that overwhelms me with emotion. The next thing I knew I was standing in front of the screen. And I started to drift closer and closer to it, until I was standing right in front of it. I knew at that moment what was happening. I was blended with my Guide and seeing through his eyes, and now he was controlling what we were doing. We slowly turned and looked back towards the theater. I was holding my breath. I knew he was going to show me myself, through his eyes. And there I was. Only, it wasn’t me. Except it was. But it didn’t look like the me I know. She was absolutely, stunningly beautiful. I almost couldn’t look at me. Was that really me? It still makes me emotional as I write this. Who was this version of me? She was wearing a full length gown, and a trailing, hooded cloak. She had long, flowing hair and her skin glowed like multicolored jewels sparkling in the light. She was utterly captivating.

When I’d seen myself standing alone in the theater earlier, from the third person view, it was just me, familiar, ordinary, kind of frumpy. But seeing myself through his eyes left me speechless. It was a bewildering experience I still can’t fully absorb. I tend to be really hard on myself. A lot. I know it blocks me and blocks my ability to see clearly. I do believe that’s partly why I was shown this. I started to cry. This was the answer to a question I hadn’t ever fully asked out loud. Why me?

There I was, standing alone in that strange and dark cinema, shining so bright and glorious that I had difficulty taking in my appearance. I immediately understood that imagery was symbolic. It represented me, here on Earth, which at this time is a very dark place. And here I stand. Tall and shining like a beacon, lighting up the path as I walk. My work here on Earth isn’t to become that. I already am that. I’m here to remember it. To bring it to my conscious awareness. I’m here to see past the physical and recognize that all this, the jewels, the glow, the beauty I couldn’t even fully behold, is my true nature, and it is the true nature of all of us.

Thank you Andy and Chen. Thank you Guides. And thank you for reading.